Archive for December, 2009
Ever been picked up by the fuzz?
(3 votes, average: 3.67 out of 5)
Loading ...Two prostitutes are standing on a corner. One says to the other, “Ever been picked up by the fuzz?”
The other replies, “No, but I’ve been swung around by the tits.”
T-G-I-F vs. S-H-I-T
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...A business man got on an elevator.
When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who
greeted him with a bright,
“T-G-I-F.”
He smiled at her and replied, “S-H-I-T.”
She looked puzzled and repeated, “T-G-I-F,” more
slowly.
He again answered, “S-H-I-T.”
The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled
her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly,
“T-G-I-F.”
The man smiled back to her and once again,
“S-H-I-T.”
The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain.
‘T-G-I-F’ means ‘Thank Goodness It’s
Friday.’ Get it, duuhhh?”
The man answered, “‘S-H-I-T’ means ‘Sorry,
Honey, It’s Thursday — duuhhh
via Daily Snacks for your Caffeine Break: T-G-I-F vs. S-H-I-T.
party crashers
(4 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5) Loading ...It was at a party and the host was getting worried
because there were too many people and not enough
refreshments.
She was sure that not all these people were invited
but did not know how to tell which ones were the
crashers. Then the husband got an idea.
He turned to the crowd and said, ‘Will those who are
from the bride’s side of the family stand up please?’
About twenty people stood up.
Then he asked, ‘Will those of you who are from the
groom’s side of the family stand up as well?’
About twenty five people stood up.
Then he smiled and said, ‘Will all those who stood up
please leave, this is a birthday party!’.
A visit from Grandma and Grandpa
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5) Loading ...Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son’s medicine-cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills. The son said : ‘I don’t think you should take one, Dad. They’re very strong and very expensive.’ ‘How much?’ asked Grandpa. ‘$10.00 a pill.’ answered the son.‘I don’t care,’ said Grandpa,‘I’d still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I’ll put the money under the pillow.’ Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow.He called Grandpa and said : ‘Dad, I told you each pill costs $10.00, not $110.00. ‘ ‘I know,’ said Grandpa. ‘The hundred is from Grandma!’