Tiki Humor

Machine wash warm, inside out with like colors. Use only non-chlorine bleach tumble dry medium. Medium hot iron Do not iron print!

———————- OR ———————-
GIVE IT TO OUR WOMAN
It’s Her Job

apparently this label caused some commotion.

via  The Consumerist

Feminist Frequency’s Anita Sarkeesian takes the Best Picture nominees from the 2012 Academy Awards and applies The Bechdel Test to them.

via Feminism and the 2012 Oscars.

The room was full of pregnant women with their partners. The class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly and was telling the men how to give the necessary assurance to their partners at this stage of the pregnancy.

She said “Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you! Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just take several steps and stay on a soft surface like grass or a path.”

She looked at the men in the room, “and Gentlemen, remember — You’re in this together — It wouldn’t hurt you to go walking with her.

The room suddenly got very quiet as the men absorbed this information. Then a man at the back of the room slowly raised his hand.

Yes”, answered the Instructor.

I was just wondering if it would be all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk?”

via Bits and Pieces.

Q: How do you turn your dishwasher into a snowblower?

A: Hand her a shovel.

1. One human cell contains 75MB genetic information.

2. One sperm contains a half of that; that is 37.5MB.

3. One ml of semen contains 100 million sperms.

4. In average, ejaculation lasts for 5 sec and contains 2.25 ml semen.

5. This means that the throughput of a man's member is equal to (37.5MB x 100,000,000 x 2.25)/5 = 1 687 500 000 000 000 byte/second = 1,6875 Тerabyte/sec

This means that the female eggcell withstands this DDoS attack at 1,5 terabyte per second, and only lets through one(!) data package, thereby being the best freaking hardware firewall in the world!

The downside of it is that this only small data package that it lets through, hangs the system for the whole of 9 months!

via Women, the best freaking firewall in the world : funny.

God created woman, and she had 3 breasts. He said to the woman, Is there anything on you that you’d like to change?  She said, Yes. Could you get rid of this middle breast?  God snapped his fingers and it was done. She exclaimed, holding the third breast in her hand, What am I going to do with this useless boob?  And God created man.

via Thur Sept 3 « Lefturn’s Funny Shit.

Two women were having lunch together, and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman says, I need to be honest with you, I’m getting a boob job.  The second woman says Oh that’s nothing, I’m thinking of having my asshole bleached!  To which the first replies, Whoa I just can’t picture your husband as a blonde! 
– Thur April 16 « Lefturn’s Funny Shit