Tiki Humor

Reasons a Vibrator is Better Than a Man

* A vibrators only function is to please you.

* They don’t watch televised sports when you want to talk.

* They don’t talk when you want to watch a movie on TV.

* You’ll never have to put your vibrator in your mouth.

* Vibrators never pick their nose in bed.

* Vibrators move.

* Vibrators find all the right spots.

* Vibrators don’t do household chores— but you don’t care.

* A vibrator never leaves you or flirts with your friends.

* Vibrators never make a mess.

* You never worry about where your vibrator has been before.

* A vibrator will never call out someone else’s name when it is with you.

* A vibrator will never ask you to bring it a beer.

* Even if your vibrator is working overtime, you know exactly where it is.

* A vibrator is easy to turn on and off.

* You can spend hours in a bar with your vibrator, and it will still be able to perform when you get it home.

* A vibrator doesn’t care how long it takes to satisfy you.

* Your mother will never ask what your vibrator does for a living.

* A vibrator won’t get pissed of when dinner isn’t cooked.

* Vibrators can’t get you pregnant, give you a disease, or make you watch auto racing.

* Vibrators take up very little room on the bed.

* Vibrators never bother you when you want to sleep.

* Vibrators never compare size with other vibrators.

* You’ll never have to share your vibrator with another woman.

* Your vibrator doesn’t mind if you forget to shave.

* Vibrators never fart in bed.

* A vibrator won’t turn off before you finish.

* It is ok to have more than one vibrator in bed with you at a time.

* If you have a headache or your period, you won’t find a vibrator turned on when you get into bed.

* Vibrators are ALWAYS hard.

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